June is LGBT Pride Month – a time to celebrate and support our fellow humans for who they are and whom they love. Not just in June, but every day let us celebrate love in every form for all that it brings to the world. Love is support, love is recognition, love is pride in yourself and others, love is a kind word, love is acceptance, love is community, love is affirmation, and to quote Lin-Manuel Miranda, “Love is love is love is love is love is love is love is love.” Polk Pride will hold its Pride festivities June 8 through 15 to celebrate the LGBTQ community. Polk Pride alongside LYA and PFLAG of Polk County have made it their mission to be a resource for local LGBTQ individuals, a community with open arms, and to provide them a “safe and supportive environment.” We spoke with members from the Polk Pride Board to discuss their initiatives, goals, and community impact. Why Polk Needs Pride The positive impact Polk Pride, PFLAG of Polk County, and LYA have on LGBTQ youth and underserved members within Polk County truly reaches somewhere over the rainbow and contributes to an overall more successful community. “As I reflect in the past years of our events, the sole thing that I think moves and motivates all of us, especially in an area like central Florida is to see the safe space that gets created for the youth,” said Dustin Shay. “They sometimes don’t have an outlet for who they are as an individual, for who they want to love, sometimes those things feel a little sheltered for all kids, but even more so for LGBTQ kids.” He encourages LGBTQ youth and allies to get involved. “For them to be involved is drastically important, not just for them but for the future of our group because they are going to be our future leaders, coworkers, business owners, and to instill something like that in them at this age within this critical time is great, and that’s why we do it.” To support any of these three organizations, you can become a sponsor, volunteer, donate, join their initiatives or simply like and share their social media. “More importantly than that,” said Shay, “we need the development of the idea. We need people to be participating, we need people to come out, we need people to show support. It’s the message really that we’re trying to flourish through the community.” Prior to the inception of Polk Pride, LYA (Lakeland Youth Alliance) and PFLAG (Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) of Polk County were strong resources for LGBTQ individuals and their families. An executive board member of Polk Pride, Dustin Shay explained that Kristine Lally, now president of LYA, and Scott Guira, founder of Polk Pride, both previously sat on the LYA board. From their perspective working with youth, they had a vision of something that kept young people from having to travel to Tampa or Orlando for LGBTQ activities. With this vision in mind, Guira launched Polk Pride in 2014, with their inaugural event the following year. “He came to a few close people that he thought would be proactive, smart, hardworking, beneficial, already involved in the community and kind of pieced together a little team – and we were all on board,” said Shay. Polk Pride is now made up of six Executive Board Members: Scott Guira, Kerri McCoy, Kristine Lally, Patrick Patterson, Dustin Shay, and Nick Sotolongo. Polk Pride, LYA, and PFLAG of Polk County aren’t formally affiliated, but do share resources and work together to put on Pride. “It’s easier for us to pool resources whether it’s events, communications, marketing, social media. We kind of share across these different platforms so we have maximum reach with the same message,” said Shay. This year, the multi-day Pride festival will include the Pride Launch Party on June 8, Pride for Youth on June 12, Pride in Faith on June 13, Pride Kickoff Cocktail Party on June 14, and Pride in the Park on June 15. Up to 5000 people and around 100 vendors attend their free, family-friendly anchor event, Pride in the Park. “This isn’t a festival just for LGBTQ. We have businesses, allies, family, friends. It is a Pride, but it’s so much more than that,” said Shay. “It’s really about celebration.” The concerted efforts and reach of the three organizations span beyond Pride week. “We found that having PFLAG, LYA and Pride served an area of our community that had not yet been served through other resources – essentially, that’s why it’s here. That’s why it’s valuable,” said Shay. An ultimate goal of Polk Pride, according to Shay, is to have something larger than a festival format. “In a perfect vision, we’d love to have a Lakeland Pride parade or even a larger venue than what we have now at Munn Park,” he said. Pride events are seasonal, happening only in June, but Polk Pride has monthly board meetings and hosts networking and social events throughout the year. In the 2019-2020 year, the group also plans to open some of their meetings in what Shay described as a “town hall format.” In these meetings, Dustin said, “We’re going to invite community individuals to come to some of our board meetings which will offer some delegation of volunteer opportunities.” He added, “While the executive board will still maintain the direction and the vision of the process, we’re going to start involving a little bit more in hopes that we will eventually develop future board members.” 21 A chapter of the Orlando Youth Alliance, LYA started in 2008. Current LYA president, Kristine Lally discussed what drew her to the organization as an ally of the LGBTQ community. “I grew up in this county and saw many friends kicked out of their homes and treated horribly by their families, I wanted to do all I could to support the LGBT youth in Polk County,” said Lally. Lally went on to voice their mission which is shared with their parent organization OYA, “To provide a nonexploitative, safe, drug and alcohol-free, social outlet for youth ages 13 to 20 who are grappling with gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and questioning issues. / To be proudly diverse by opening membership to youth without regard to sexual orientation, gender, religion, race or background. / To serve as an educational and referral service for LGBTQ youth of Central Florida. / To educate parents, academia, health care workers and other human service professionals about the development and diversity of sexuality and sensitize them to the reality and needs of the LGBTQ community. / To facilitate in the development of the LGBTQ youth and to empower them to become leaders in the community.” Along with monthly support meetings and special activities, LYA holds an annual Prom event and are included in the Polk Pride events in June. Lally shared LYA’s vision for the future, saying, “Our long term vision is to continue our growth as a resource and advocate to LGBTQ and ally youth within the local school systems. We have a goal to be a single source advocacy group for the community of students and educators within Polk County.” A step towards this goal, the Polk County School Board has approved their Pride week proclamation for the past two years, with 2019 being the third. Any LGBTQ youth or ally that would like to get involved with LYA can go through their social media or website listed below. Help spread the word! Lally concluded, “We want to be a common thought for those who need the support we offer.” For 25 years, the Polk County chapter of the national group, PFLAG has been a support group for anyone in the community with an LGBTQ family member or friend. The group is there to help answer questions, show support, and offer resources to these families. Shay remarked, “Sometimes the process for the youth or the individual coming out is their own struggle but it’s also a completely different struggle for the parent or the friend or family member – so we provide a lot of materials for that.” PFLAG of Polk County president, Kerri McCoy found out about the group through her aunt who is a lesbian. When McCoy’s son came out in high school, her aunt suggested she get involved with the group. McCoy had no qualms about her son being gay, she fully supported him. “I don’t understand, I don’t need support,” she told her aunt. Her aunt replied, “No, so you can help others.” After three years of working with the group, McCoy became its president. “When people come to us and they do need help, we can provide them with websites to go to, we have a list of counselors that are LGBTQ-friendly that can help them, if it’s a religious issue, we have several pastors and churches that we can point them to, doctors for anybody who may be transgender,” McCoy explained. The group has monthly support meetings and are also a part of Pride week. To find out more about PFLAG, information about attending a meeting, or to get involved, check out their website and social media listed below. Polk Pride See their website for a full list of dates and times of Polk Pride 2019 events. www.polkpridefl.com FB: @PolkPrideFL IG: @polkpridefl LYA lakelandyouthalliance.org FB: @LakelandYouthAlliance IG: @oya_cfl PFLAG of Polk County pflagofpolkcounty.org FB: @PFLAGofPolkCounty

Through her law practice, Foley Immigration Law and nonprofit The Red Tent Initiative, Lakeland attorney, Alison Foley-Rothrock is using her voice to bust stigmas and give power to victims as a survivor, advocate and leader. Alison grew up in the northeast and went to school in Rhode Island where she graduated with her bachelor’s degree and attended law school. “I wanted to be involved in law because I see it as an extension of politics. I’ve always been very political and motivated by ideas of justice and human rights,” said Foley-Rothrock. She has been dedicated to practicing immigration law since 2004. Prior to her law career, Alison looked into teaching and the arts, two things she loves, but decided she wanted to do something that would use her talents in a more impactful way. Starting Her Own Practice In 2006, a year and a half out of law school, after just finding out that she was pregnant with her first child, Alison’s position at a nonprofit she’d been working for was cut. The more she had been immersed in immigration law, the more she felt that helping immigrants, especially immigrant victims of crime, was exactly where she needed to be. The only way she could continue to do that and provide for her growing family was to go into private practice. Foley-Rothrock started her practice, Foley Immigration Law that year. When Alison found herself going through a divorce with a toddler and another on the way, it the security of a steady paycheck led her to take a position at a nonprofit she had volunteered for. In 2010, Alison was offered a job to be in private practice, that would move her family to Clearwater, Florida. “The opportunity both to move south and to go back into private practice […] was too good to pass up,” she said. In November of 2011 when the attorney who had hired her, closed her firm, Foley-Rothrock continued in private practice for herself. She met her husband in 2014 and then fell in love with Lakeland shortly after, moving her family and practice. The Red Tent Initiative In 2015, motivated by her work with nonprofits and her own experiences, Foley-Rothrock started the Red Tent Initiative. “One of the reasons I had always stuck with nonprofits was because I have a real passion for helping survivors of domestic violence and other types of crime, abuse, and exploitation,” she explained. In working with clients at her practice, Alison realized one of their biggest needs was someone they could talk to who could relate to what they had been through. As a child, Alison herself grew up in an abusive home. In adulthood, she found herself in a series of toxic relationships. “Part of my recovery from that was to learn to talk about it with other people and sort of shake off the shame and stigma that comes with being a survivor,” she said. “Statistically speaking, domestic violence happens across all spectrums. The one group who are actually more vulnerable are people who are born in foreign countries and move to the U.S.” She noticed all of the overlaps within the immigration work she was doing. “I was seeing people who were having these layers of vulnerability and disadvantage – having been born in another country, maybe being undocumented, or not having U.S. citizenship yet, or maybe not speaking the language.” “It was only when I experienced it myself and I tried to access services with all of the advantages that I do have – I speak the language, I’m a U.S. citizen, I’m educated, I had the main income in our household – still, it was really hard to pull myself away and find support,” she said. “When I did find support services available, I felt like the attitude of the people who worked in these services tended to be kind of condescending. They asked those same questions that made me feel like it was my fault,” Foley-Rothrock explained. To Alison, this was a gap that needed to be bridged. When working with clients who were facing similar circumstances, Foley-Rothrock lifted the detached, inhuman veil that traditionally exists between lawyer and client. She discovered, “If I would tell them, ‘It happened to me too. I understand what you’re going through because I’ve been there,’ it really changed the whole dynamic between us.” The Red Tent Initiative came out of that idea that sharing survivor stories is a powerful thing. “It defies this idea that this is stuff that we don’t talk about, that the shame and stigma are for the victim to bare going forward, that they’re the ones who have to work through it, the totally false idea that victims are people that you don’t run into every day.” The first Red Tent event was held on March 31, 2015. The date fell at the end of International Women’s History Month and the eve of Sexual Assault Awareness Month. “We felt like it was kind symbolic of how far we’ve come and how far we still have to go,” said the organization’s founder. Foley-Rothrock invited influential women in the community to speak. She was surprised to hear survival stories from all of the women she had invited. Business owners, people who ran nonprofits, community leaders – they each had stories about domestic violence, sexual assault, and human trafficking. This inspired the attorney. “If they could just talk about the fact that they’ve been survivors more, it might change the way we all look at survivors and change the way that people who are in situations where they are being victimized think about their own possibilities.” The Red Tent Initiative has since turned into a monthly event, showcasing local artists, musicians, spoken word poets, and visual artists to do a themed show telling the stories of survivors, and giving the floor to survivors to share their own stories.“We couple it with art to make it more impactful and to show the beauty of being a survivor and the strength of survivors and hopefully inspire people to take action,” said the Red Tent founder. Funds collected by the organization are used to fill gaps in which social services aren’t able to meet – needs like assistance with safe houses, groceries, and car insurance. The Red Tent Initiative is a radically inclusive network made up entirely of survivors and allies. If you or someone you know is an exploitative or abusive situation, you can contact the Red Tent Initiative at (813) 424-0652 or through their website at redtentinitiative.org . CityMaker Alison was recognized by the City of Lakeland as a CityMaker in November 2018 by Mayor Bill Mutz for her work as an attorney and advocate. She admitted she felt a little cautious moving to Polk County, an area known for being conservative. Alison explained that she doesn’t fall within the borders of what might be deemed “socially acceptable” to a conservative community. She identifies as queer, her husband is transgender, she has multiracial children, practices immigration law, and advocates for awareness of topics that are uncomfortable for some to acknowledge. “To get an award that to me kind of symbolizes acceptance – not just acceptance but being embraced by this community – it was way more than a pat on the back,” she said. “That really meant a lot to me.” Loud and Proud As a queer-identifying person, Alison voiced that she thinks Polk County is moving in the right direction in regard to embracing the LGBTQ community. “I think it’s important for everyone to realize that everyone who might otherwise be seen as outsiders as not having potential, often become leaders in our communities. It’s important to me to be loud and proud as both someone who is in the LGBT community and a survivor because these are things that a lot of times carry shame and stigma, especially in conservative communities, it’s all the more important for me to put that out front,” said Foley-Rothrock. “If you want to be my friend and my supporter, you have to embrace the whole package. You can’t compartmentalize who I am in your mind, to make me more acceptable.” Photo by Amy Sexson

Life has a funny way of taking us in a direction unforeseen. You may go to places you’ve never been or come back to somewhere you never thought you would. Winter Haven resident, Joel Carrier has learned to clasp life’s leading hand and embrace being present – wherever that might be. Born in California, Carrier’s family moved to Iowa when he was just a baby. They made their way to Polk County when Joel was a teenager. Starting out as a Political Science major at Florida State, Carrier instead opted for a degree in Communications. Following college, Carrier moved to Michigan where he would live for the next 30 years. He spent five years with a public relations agency, then in the promotion department of a Fox affiliate. Joel came to the decision that he either wanted to live in a major market or become a freelance writer by the time he was 32. Taking the freelance writing route, Joel wrote for the Grand Rapids Press and its sister publications in Michigan. He flourished as a contract writer for Amway, becoming the lead writer in North America for their Artistry Skincare line, the fifth leading prestige brand in the world at the time. His portfolio includes the likes of fashion journalism, home and design writing, features, and human-interest pieces. Carrier opened his 3400 square foot vintage home furnishing store in Grand Rapids, in 2000. He owned and operated the store for 13 years. Life pulled Joel in an unexpected direction seven years ago when he came down to care for his mother who was having a medical procedure. He traveled from Michigan with intentions to stay for one week. That week turned into the first year caring for his mom. She had a live-in caregiver, but Joel wanted to be there for her. When it became apparent he was going to be in Florida for a while, he decided to get a job. As a wine consultant for ABC, he was able to earn a living and have time to spend with his mother. She passed away two years ago. “The five years I spent with my mom, I would not exchange those for anything,” expressed Joel. The Next Chapter Ready to invest in a different career, Joel decided to give real estate a go. “It has worked out beautifully,” he said. “I am absolutely loving this next chapter in my life.” A creative person with an affinity for interacting with people, Joel has found a dream profession as a real estate agent with Keller Williams Realty in Lakeland. Smoothing out difficult transactions and working tirelessly at the last minute to bring a transaction to close allow Carrier to tap into his creativity and love for people. Last year, he was working with a buyer who wanted a home for himself and his mother at a price point of $70K. Joel remembered, “It was tough finding him the right place at a very difficult price point. It took months, but we found it. I came home to a card that simply said, ‘Thank you for making my dream come true.’ I keep that card on my credenza in my hallway, so I see it every day when I walk in.” Motivated to continue making his clients’ dreams come true, Carrier aims to close 48 units this year. “This decision to join my particular team, Florida Spotlight Homes Group at this particular office has been a life changer for me because there are so many good people,” he said. “The leadership and the culture is all from the heart – all about family and helping people and giving back.” Passion for Politics News and politics have always captured Carrier – he joked that he considers himself somewhat of a politics nerd. He has volunteered on political campaigns and belongs to Rainbow Ridge, a local LGBTQ political organization. Discussing what he would like to see for the country in the future, Joel said, “What I’d like to see happen in this country is for the divisiveness to just end.” He continued, “It’s not Democrat versus Republican, gay versus straight, black versus white – we have become so incredibly divisive that there is no conversation anymore.” One way to change this divisiveness in everyday life, Carrier says, is “To encourage people to not judge someone until you’ve walked in their shoes.” LGBTQ in Polk When Carrier first lived in Polk County as a teenager, he wasn’t a fan. When he returned, he didn’t anticipate staying. “At first I was vehemently opposed because I was hanging on to my, what I know now, are misconceptions of Polk County.” Over the last 35-40 years, the area has really changed according to Joel. “There are a heck of a lot of damn good people here,” he said. In terms of being gay in Polk County, he said it’s no different from anywhere else. “Being gay is a part of who I am, but it doesn’t define me.” He tends to gravitate towards people who are open-minded and nonjudgmental, even if they don’t share the same views on everything. He has happily managed to find those people here. Enjoying Right Now Joel Carrier has made an impassioned effort to live in the moment and be present. This is rooted in his informal studying of Tibetan Buddhism in Grand Rapids. “The philosophy speaks to me […] because it’s so internal based and it holds us to be accountable to ourselves and to society – to be good and do good,” said Carrier. “The past two years have been a real transition point for me in my personal life,” he noted. Though his one week in Florida turned into a permanent stay wasn’t what he had planned, Joel said, “That’s not a negative by any means, it’s been a wonderful journey.” Now getting into a flow and settling down, he plans to get back to the things he enjoys in life – yoga, cycling, reading (literary nonfiction is his favorite), writing, and soaking in each moment with his friends and loved ones. Prior to this period of readjustment, Carrier practiced yoga for some twenty years and even taught it. He also spent 20 years riding his bike, five nights a week, 12-15 miles a night. A highlight of his life was accomplishing a ride across the state of Texas for an AIDS fundraiser. About another happy piece of his life, Joel said, “I am dating the most remarkable man in the world and at this point in my life to have been so lucky to meet someone like that has just been an amazing experience,” said Joel. The two are currently renovating their house. “I’m perfectly content just slowing down and enjoying. Some of my favorite times are with Billy, sitting on his front porch, talking and watching the sunset and drinking wine, hanging out with my friends at the pool on Sundays, and being completely irresponsible at my age,” he smiled. Photo by Amy Sexson